2015 wouldn’t be complete without an arbitrary list of the year’s best songs written as irrefutable fact rather than barely cohesive opinion.

Here’s ours. To make matters even worse not all these tunes were even released this year, some of them we just heard for the first time. And there’s 14 of them which is weird.

Seriously it’s like we’re not even trying any more…

Mike Garry & Joe Duddell: St Anthony – An Ode to Anthony H Wilson

Released in August on the 8^th anniversary of Tony Wilson’s death, this 9 minute encapsulation of a culture that defined PD’s youth and the man who laid claim to it (to be honest if one man could it would be Mr Wilson) makes us weep with joy and nostalgia each & every time.

Also there’s a remix by God (AKA Andrew Weatherall).

Grasscut: Red Kite

 In July we were ready to call Black Rivers’ eponymous debut album of the year. Then Grasscut’s “Everyone Was A Bird” flew in. Huge, sweeping, pastoral tunes with a touch of Kes in the evocative lyrical tributes to the British countryside. We saw Grasscut at the Union Chapel one Saturday in November (Daylight Music is an ongoing series of free gigs at the Chapel. Worth dropping in on) where they also stole gig of the year in a soaring 30 minutes.

Everything Everything: The Distant Past

Crams so much fun into 3 minutes 42 seconds it’s like Flight Of The Concords trapped in a washing machine with Hot Chip on a fast spin.

Public Service Broadcasting: Gagarin

 To be honest the entire Race For Space album is nerdcore joy so it was a toughy but this one has big, tarty horns and just look at the video.

Holly Cooke: Shadow Kissing

Yes yes yes we know this is 4 years old but Holly Cook dominated our Summer more than Uptown Bleedin’ Funk so we’re sharing this.

Drenge: We Can Do What We Want:

Drenge. There’s 2 of them. Making all this noise. Like QOTSA, ACDC & The Buzzcocks had an accident in Jeff Goldblum’s teleportation machine. We defy you not to jump up & down like a loon to this.

Missy Elliot:  WTF

Ooh ooh Nicki Minaj, Azalea Banks, Iggy Azalea they’re so challenging, risky & inventive. They really push the boundaries of hip hop. They’re just such powerful, independent female role models.

Shit! Missy’s back! Put your arse away and Look busy!

Gwenno: Chwyldro (Andrew Weatherall Remix)

 And now, telepathically projecting in from the Welsh Dimension is Gwenno. Comparisons to SFA are inevitable but beyond the Cymru connection Gwenno shares a fantastic knack for crafting dreamy pop tunes laced with psychedelia.

We were hoping to share the Andrew Weatherall mix with you but it’s not on the Youtubes so you’ll have to imagine what it sounds like.

New Order: Plastic

Hooky, honestly, we love you but you need to stop chatting nonsense about New Order being imposters. Plastic is without doubt the best thing the band have produced since Technique and you’re not on it. Shush.

Black Rivers: The Ship

The Williams’ Brothers (formerly of Doves) collection of mini-epics retains their triumphant tune-smithery but adds a more electronic sound. The whole album is a gem but The Ship is a rolling, mechanical monster.

Wolf Alice: You’re A Germ

Everyone loves Wolf Alice don’t they? They’re like all the good bits of early 90’s guitar pop rolled into one. “You’re A Germ” finds them in Spikey Sub-Pop mode and is a perfect jumping up & down companion to Drenge.

Ibibio Sound Machine: Let’s Dance

Well ok then Ibibio Sound Machine, if you insist. Let’s Dance is so infectious it would give a 3 day old corpse the funk.

We’ve decided to call Ibibio Sound Machine Afrofuturist-electro-funk. What with all the genre inventing it’s like the NME before it turned rubbish round here in’t it?

Curated Christmas gift lists for men tend to focus on three things; beer, football & Jeremy Clarkson.

A beer fridge in the shape of a football shirt that quotes Jeremy Clarkson when you open the door? A picture of Jeremy Clarkson wearing a football shirt made of Beer Cans? Beer that tastes of footballs and Jeremy Clarkson? Oh and cufflinks. Seriously, what’s wrong with buttons?

In short the majority of these lists are a bit shit as they assume all men have the same interests. The following list we would like to think is more discerning for the modern man with geeky leanings.

1: Sunspel, Loop Back Sweatshirt in Black

Black is a deceptive colour. In a cheap black, one can resemble a Fancy Dress Goth. As Father Ted once said ‘Only priest’s socks are truly black, everyone else’s are just very, very, very, very, very dark blue’.

This Sweatshirt from Sunspel is not only a quality essential from the kings of quality essentials, it is also of a black so deep and rich it absorbs light and bends time… possibly.

http://www.sunspel.com/uk/mens/sweats/loopback-sweat-top-4.html

2: Adidas ‘Stan Smith’ Raf Simons Reboot

While we’re on a monochromatic vibe, Raf Simons takes a bona fide classic and remixes it in a series of colours that could only be described as ‘blimey’. The green ones look a bit like they’ve fallen off a ‘Radioactive Commando Action Man’ but that may be your thing. We like the white ones.

http://www.oki-ni.com/en/shop/footwear/adidas-by-raf-simons-white-stan-smith-sneakers-002638.html

3: Unbranded Brand, Selvedge, Raw Denim Jeans

Admirers of quality jeans have become the sartorial equivalent of the crate digging Electronica bore. Unless you’ve dropped a grand on a pair 3d printed in space you can jog on.

Unbranded Brand have eschewed the nonsense in favour of high quality, simply styled jeans in just 3 cuts & 2 colours at almost suspiciously reasonable prices. Look after these jeans & they’ll look after you. Not literally. They’re crap in a fist fight and can’t lend you money.

http://www.liquorstoreclothing.com/the-unbranded-brand-m48

Subscriptions

There are few pleasures rare as a regular surprise dropping through your letter hole. (*consider rewriting that line)

Subscriptions are the gift that keep giving & remind one of childhood’s weekly arrival of The Beano or 2000ad. Now we’re grownups there are exciting & sophisticated alternatives to comic book violence popping through your postal slit (*consider rewriting this line also)

4: Subscription To Flying Vinyl

This is what it says on Flying Vinyl’s website.

FLYING VINYL MEMBERS GET A BOX OF EXCLUSIVE VINYL RECORDS FROM THE BEST NEW ALTERNATIVE ARTISTS, EVERY SINGLE MONTH

The font is big because the sentence is important. These people are heroes and should be given a medal. Made of Vinyl.

http://www.flyingvinyl.co.uk

5: Subscription To Geeky Monkey

Why isn’t there a monthly magazine written by nerds compulsively obsessed with Sci-Fi movies, 1980’s Sci-Fi Movies, Not Sci-Fi Movies, video games, 1980’s video games, people who make sci-fi movies & video games, Game Of Thrones, strange books, gadgets and wrestling you ask?

Well there is now you lucky buggers and it’s called Geeky Monkey.

http://www.get-geeky.today

6: Some Happy Socks from Happy Socks

Socks get a bad rep as a Christmas gift. Happy Socks’ website looks like Mondrean spent too much time hanging out with Trevor Horn but they’re Swedish so get away with it. My first exposure to Happy Socks was during a meeting. I was distracted by the Esher style, abstract stylings of my colleague’s foot attire. You know what kind of sock can bring a high octane meeting about the font weight of an email header to a crashing halt? A Happy Sock.

https://www.happysocks.com/uk/

7: Mo’Wax Urban Archaeology: 21 Years Of Mo’Wax Recordings

James Lavelle started 90’s coolest record label, Mo’ Wax, at 18.

In 96 Mo’ Wax released one of the defining albums of the decade, DJ Shadow’s Endtroducing.

Beyond phenomenal taste in epoch shaking sounds, Lavelle also has a fine eye for design.

Now we wouldn’t say James Lavelle was a precociously talented smart-arse but leafing through the impeccably realised & exhaustive history “Mo’Wax: Urban Archaeology” the thought may cross your mind.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/MoWax-Urban-Archaeology-Years-Recordings/dp/0847842428

8: Drew Struzan: Oeuvre.

Once upon a time movie posters were important. The very first glimpse into a new, cinematic world they were hand painted, epic, thrilling mysterious works of art and almost exclusively the creation of one man. Drew Struzan.

Ouevre brings together the entire collection of Struzan’s work from the iconic Indiana Jones & The Temple Of Doom & Back To The Future to recent, unused but nevertheless beautiful work for Hell Boy & Cowboys & Aliens.

Having been coaxed out of retirement for Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Struzan’s return should bring an end to the tyranny of photoshop abominations such as Fassbender peering out of the stomach of his own shadow on “Xmen First Class” and Paul Rudd leaning on random women.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Drew-Struzan-Oeuvre/dp/0857685570

9: Penny Dreadful Tailored Boxer Shorts

You could do worse than revolutionising your Man’s underwear drawer with some exquisitely tailored, beautifully illustrated boxer shorts in high quality cotton from a bunch of chancers who call themselves Penny Dreadful Menswear. I mean really, the cheek of it!

http://www.houseofdreadful.com/product/lisa-from-behind-in-blue/